“All things that happen in your life is designed… That God put people in your life for a reason… Faith is first… then it is integrity.” —Kenny
He resembles Hall of Fame’s Dave Winfield, Frank Thomas and Ozzie Newsome as he played for the Texas Rangers, San Diego Padres and Montreal Expo’s. Then there is his time with the Buffalo Bills when he realized that the skies the limit in playing two Super Bowls. But his depth is deeper than his athletic success, charming character and pleasant disposition. Today’s stranger… now friend, Kenny, speaks of faith, respect, community, love and culture.
With the confidence of a seasoned coach he encourages us to dream big… the right way.
“We often times to get stuck with the expectations of society, what we’re supposed to do, how we are supposed to live our lives and you don’t want to get caught up in other people’s expectations…” — Erik
“Remember to be you. Authentically you and smile to strangers and love everybody but love yourself. Always, always, always just do that little bit extra, even if it’s not convenient. That’s my advice.” —Roshan
So there I was, sitting at my desk, consumed in completing a long list of tasks as I prioritized my actions. It’s a common ritual for all of us. Our life, our work and our play expands and contracts with deadlines and commitments. We end days on highs, and we end days on lows. Yet in all, lessons are learned.
On a regular basis we gaze upon our goal lists, contemplating our futures as we dream of “that day when.”
Why the sentimental intro? You might ask. Well, I re-learned another lesson today, one that directly links to the very reasoning that grounds why Operation-365 exists, and to why I will do my part in growing our community.
5:00pm… I peeled myself from my desk, redirected (by a nagging subconscious) away from what I perceived as the days priorities. You know, those quite thoughts that dwell in the background of what we agonize as have to do’s.
“Time to stop…” it whispered… “Get out of yourself,” It advised… “Your day has been full and there is someone you are meant to meet,” It challenged.
Now I’m only a few short days into our second one-year commitment of daily interviews of strangers (now friends), and today’s new friend has proven just how united we can be.
5:15pm… that little voice in my mind has directed me to Warner Park. I’ve been here before, even have made a few friends of 365 here. But today’s whisper feels more direct than ever. If there is one thing 365 has taught me, it is to acknowledge that little thing we call intuition. We all have it… but the question to ask ourselves is, do we follow it?
5:20pm… Park the car, and as I do, I notice two women walking towards me on the sidewalk. Something pushes me to approach them. OK, could be a creepy guy moment. I ready myself for rejection. But to ignore a first impression of my mind would have only left me questioning my motives. For I have promised myself, and you, that I will not profile whom I approach. That I would raise my chin to the world and follow the direction of the whispering voice to approach all that I lock eyes with.
5:21’sh pm. With business card in hand, “Hi I’m Richard, I’m a photographer and film maker…” I go on in beginning to explain O-365…
I’m stopped in my tracks as Roshan and her friend shut me down… “We know you!”
I’m shocked and a little worried. “You have,” I wobble.
“Wow, yes, I totally remember them. Great couple. Loved talking with them.” We open into a wonderful conversation.
That lesson I spoke of earlier, the re-kindling of the flame we call Operation 365. It truly is more than a series of interviews. It is the beginning of a great and united community. Roshan and her friends have proven this fact. For in a city of millions, it is possible for the paths of strangers to unite on common ground. The skeptics might lean on premises the likes of 6 degrees of separation or other similar theories. But for me, the idea is much simpler… Just speak with each other and simply leave it at that.
Talk tomorrow my good friends, and Roshan, your words have smitten us.
Today’s stranger now friend, Benjamin, begins, “I would say share who you are. Share yourself so somebody gets to know you, who you truly are. There is no time for hate or anything to be passed around. There should be more love going around. It’s not enough of that. I think people are loosing sight. It’s because we are all the same. Race is not an issue…”
“I’m 22 and I quit my job recently, and its been terrifying entering the business world as someone like me who has been, like, a sensitive musician my whole life and I’m starting to confront the things that most of us deal with on a daily basis, and that’s everybody’s obsession with status, success and power; and I feel like pursuing self-employment has become this ideal… but there is a really dark side that a lot of people really don’t talk about…” —Christopher
Flip says, “You cannot spell oblivious without obvious. There is all sorts of potential all around this damn world, all in your damn self, just staring you in the face… Leave something…”
“Be the change you would like to see in the world.” Quotes Josh, today’s stranger now friend. He continues with his own words… “I’ve noticed that life doesn’t exactly get any easier; you just get more accustomed to going about your daily life. So even though things can get you down and make things worse for you. It does get better…”
Jury duty today… one of the civic obligations many of us have enjoyed on a yearly basis. A room full of sequestered people, some wanting to do their duty while others hopelessly scheme for the perfect excuse to get out of service. But as quoted, via the strangely welcoming and compassionate smile of lady behind window 3, “I’ve heard them all.”
So the room sits, all looking at the floor, dozing off or reading as they wait to be called to bear the barrage of lawyers questions regarding their character. We are a diverse and intriguing group of strangers. I’m sure with many experiences, loves, hopes and fears. So in tribute to Operation-365, I raise my chin up to look around the room. I guess I’m looking for connections. But sadly, far too many are a guarded and shrouded behind self-created walls of invisibility. So amidst the occasional acknowledgement from curious fellow human, most just simply dismiss me as they drop their chins in looking away.
An announcement perks through the silent separation and brings many together as they look up to the ceiling. It’s as if the PA system is more human than the microphone voice of our courthouse friend (as she is in plain sight, standing only feet from us at room’s center). “If any of you cannot commit for 7 day’s, you can ask for a reschedule,” she explains.
Oh, that’s just perfect! Can’t wait to do this again in 3 months. Of course, I can’t stay for 7 more days. Already have lost 4; and if chosen to stay another week, who knows, maybe longer, the pay of $15.76 falls a little short of making my overhead. I was hoping for a 1-day trial. You know, he stole the socks from my bedroom dresser and I have the photos to prove it. Cut and dry. In and out. Must not be my week.
To window 3, as instructed I go. Yet again getting to receive the same paperwork that brought me here it the first place. Not that I like to gripe, but hats off to the systems we have in place. Could there possibly be a better way to schedule us… I don’t know. But a man has to gripe sometime. After all, I’m just as human as you. That said, looks like I’m back in May. Oh summer, how I love thee.
So now I’m standing in line for the said assistance of window 3, overhearing, and yes, buying into the banter of all who are expressing the reasoning behind why we can’t stay. Funny how easy it is to share negative comments with the world around us. So I try an experiment, I turn my thoughts to what the staff must be feeling as, I’m sure, they are overhearing our loudening words of wisdom. I recriminate myself a little regarding my less that positive gut reaction, realizing that we are all equally human, especially the workers servicing this full line of annoyed people. So I back step my thinking, choose not to look for faults, but to merely listen and observe. As I do, a calm face to the left of me comes into bright focus.
Christine is her name and it is with warm spirit that she chats with us regarding her views on compassion, trust and love.
O-365 daily blogumentary has begun, and Christine, thank you for putting us on a fantastic path. You are living proof that it is OK to talk to strangers.
First, to Damian (today’s stranger now friend) as well as to all of my 365 friends, please forgive me for not posting for several months. To be fully honest about it, the holidays, a rush of year-end business and some much needed time with my family. But with that caught up, I am jumping back into doing my part in our mission to build our community. Even readying for another one-year daily project, “O-365,” a 365 consecutive day stranger meeting blogumentary (here is a link the projects Indiegogo). Stay tuned.
I’ll never forget the time spent with new friend Damian, for over an hour he and I conversed regarding the widest range of topics: Culture, Politics, Religion and Race; all subjects that we are socially biased to not discuss. Not even with friends and family we are advised; and, whatever we do, never bring them up in business or casual dialogue. Sadly, and to a point, I agree. But with the acknowledgement of this, I do challenge us to not consider our outlooks towards our support groups, but to rather govern our reactions towards those who are living lives with altering ideologies.
Damian puts it rather bluntly, “Don’t throw a bunch of flowers in my face and call it a bouquet.”
Instead he suggests, “Ask families what they really feel about what is going on. Ask the minorities… what they really feel. If you do, you’ll get some real answers.”
In a way we are all minorities, trapped within the confines of our own minds, beliefs, and traditions. That’s OK. It’s what provides the blessing of wholly living this life experience. But unmanaged these brainwaves can also become a Pandora’s box of head discussions. Thoughts turned to actions as we project ourselves, and our agendas, onto others. You know, those nagging, this is my opinion, and that is theirs… with is conflicting resolutions. Resolves that at many times are troubling to our core selves. No I’m not advocating selfishness or harming others via self-justified atrocities. That would be a blind misrepresentation of the message Damian and I are proposing.
In Damian’s words, “If we infuse people with knowledge. Educate ourselves on what is really going on in society and not what is glorified. Focusing on the glorified is a waste of our time… useless information. If it does not effect or change your life beneficially, and you cannot use it… then what is the point?”
Education, a very soft topic for many, leads to a very sobering question: What is in store for our children and will they be prepared?
Damian is wise, “We have to stop the silly little facades that we put on our children… and our adults… and our families… facades that have never worked. Take the gatekeepers out of the game. Take the guys that stop progress out-of-the-way – The gatekeepers who always want to stop people before they themselves know the answers. They need to stop trying to take religion out of school. I believe in diverse religion in school. Being able to praise God and being able to say I love you Lord. Waking up every day with a smile on your face.”
Over the course of Operation-365 we have met people of many faiths – from Christian to Jew, Muslim to Sikh, Atheist to Self-Appointed. In this, the majority has come forth with an astounding voice. Proclaiming a message to us all. That it is possible for a community of many faiths and points-of-view to exist in sharing a common set of principles. Being a universal appeal for a safe and good life for our children and the society ahead.
So I’ll admit, I’m bewildered at why far too many get terminally caught up in the fight for righteous correctness? Choosing, by arrogant and often uninformed decision, to completely miss the boat of compassion? An observation that has endlessly troubled me deeply; but what the heck, I’ll take a stab at finding a new perspective…
…Could it be found in the eyes of the children? The very ones that we… the learned adults… do all that we can to condition for what we predict is to come. Perhaps we are correct… perhaps we are way off base…
…But what if we turned the eyeglass for a brief reversal of role? What if we allowed the child consideration in teaching us, and if we did, could we model the way they behave (especially the very young?) towards one another. Might it be plausible that they have something to teach us… we… the adults… the wise ones?
My hope is that the answer is a resounding YES. That through their example may be discovered a set of keys to open our eyes in exactly how to look beyond our differences. Damian challenges us, “We have to look and scrutinize each other and love one another as a whole… you know what I mean? This doesn’t work if we are constantly at each other throats about color, about income, about who has what… and who doesn’t have what. The thing is, in this society… the only thing that works is if we help each other. If we see each other as black and as white this whole mess is going to continue to be what it is. It’s never going to get any better. What matters is… what is important for our children and for the society we live in. What I know is this,” he continues, “if we take the time to educate ourselves… Take the time to look in each others background, we’ll find the answer we are looking for.” “So how do we accomplish this?” I ask “Take personal responsibility… for yourself… for your kids… and for the environment that you live around,” Damian begins. It is impossible for me to ignore the love and passion for good that I see in his eyes… I listen. “Always think before you talk… of what you do… because you affect other people. If you do what you say… the life you live… what you’ve chosen to take on as a human being… know that it really does affect other people. The things that you say have the power to destroy someone… or to build them up greatly. Your voice… your words… your tongue can take away someone’s life, or enhance it greatly. Don’t play with God, God is a real individual… and things really happen on this planet. To the world I would really like to say this. Overcome your shortcomings… throw away personal vendettas… throw away greed, guile, mistrust. Learn to truly like a person for who they are, and not for the color of their skin; because in the end, you lose out, not the other way around.”
He quotes Albert Einstein: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results,” a quote that (for good reason) has often been shared by many of our 365 friends.
With the blunt passion that one would expect from Damian, he gives us his concluding words of activation. “We know how far we will go… and we know how far we will not. History has shown us a reflection of ourselves, and what we will do when everything get’s down to the wire. Don’t be that guy with butter on his head. The one that doesn’t know what’s going on… Be a contributor.”
So I ask myself, as Damian has challenged, what will I do when it get’s down to the wire?
A thought for us all, I guess?
Damian challenges us, “We have to look and scrutinize each other and love one another as a whole… you know what I mean? This doesn’t work if we are constantly at each other throats about color, about income, about who has what… and who doesn’t have what. The thing is, in this society… the only thing that works is if we help each other. If we see each other as black and as white this whole mess is going to continue to be what it is. It’s never going to get any better. What matters is… what is important for our children and for the society we live in.