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SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 345: “Serendipity, Karma, Fate, Accident, Coincidence?”

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Serendipity, Karma, Fate, Accident, Coincidence or any other theories from Gestalt to a broad range of reference on a number of laws of attraction, all concepts to consider in the meeting of today’s strangers turned friends, Autumn and Jason.

And I promise that I am not wearing any symbolic pendant or sporting any form of religious apparel. So you are safe in the knowledge that you aren’t being led towards jumping off any new age pier or be recruited to a cultish fellowship in my opening references of cosmic powers.

I’m not trying to lean towards the spiritual or supernatural, but I have to say, that there have been way too many experiences in my 365 travels, which through a great variety of situations, has proven to me the idea of attraction is not to be ignored.

Proven by truths that have revealed themselves via the notion of equal does actually attract equal. Truths that have also led me on darker paths that contrastively showcase a sadder side of this human experience. That being the equally suggestive findings that negative outlooks do manifest themselves in attracting the same.

And within the two sides of these scales of reference is the place where most of us exist as we try to figure out exactly how to navigate our futures and master self.

So in the middle I comfortably sit, not rich, not poor… not ill, corrupted our contemptuous… but still nowhere near any nirvana of mental, physical and spiritual balance.

Some days are overflowing with amazing gifts and inspiration, others straight-line me like miles of still water. Yet in either, and for all of us, there is opportunity to understand. The challenge in doing so is really quite easy, requires no capital investment, no hours of psychological treatment and no exposing of any vulnerable self-issue. Only three tools are needed to survive, and even flourish in this middle ground of life: The ability to look, the desire to listen, and the discipline to hear. All attributes that collide with me today in the meeting of Autumn and Jason.

It started with a distant sighting of Autumn (as she walked on the sidewalk) during a commute with my family. When only a block from my home my wife leans to me in saying, “Go talk to her,” as she synch’s in noting Autumn walking in the direction of our home.

Into the driveway I rip and off to my office I sprint in grabbing my equipment… The race begins in not wanting to lose track of our recently spotted stranger. I find myself doing a side swaying racing walk as I bank around a corner just ahead of where we first took glimpse of Autumn… But she is nowhere in sight.

Well… I’m out of the house now. And with camera in hand I decide to keep moving in my South bound stroll. It a good thing that I do. For on the next block I again see Autumn as she is stopped in conversation with Jason.

I approach them respectfully. Not wanting to be too interruptive of a conversation that I assume is between familiar friends. To my amazement, this is not the case.

Per Jason, “I don’t know Autumn, forty-four days ago I committed to meet a stranger every day and as I was driving she caught my attention. So I stopped to talk to her.”

I’m floored! Seems Jason is on the same path as I and he too has felt of whatever vibe Autumn is giving off.

It’s beyond me, but for some reason, I feel we are supposed to be talking. Without reservation the three of us find ourselves engulfed in conversation with a feeling that is reminiscent of friends known for life. The comfort level we share is overwhelming, even sharing hugs and departing sentiments in the closing of our short time together. Per the words of Jason, “This has been the highlight of my day.”

“Oh my goodness…” Autumn expresses in bridging her council to us all, “…and I have to put my ego aside to say that we all have the same answer within us. We are the reflection of one another… God living through us to experience itself, and the loving wisdom of the universe; the answer, and the key, is to love one another, and, if we do, then we can love ourselves.”

Jason ads (and remember we are all total strangers), “Always look for that good in somebody… no matter what walk of life, or whatever that person is, there is always something. Any human on Earth has that something good inside of them. You may have to search deeper, but we need to try to find that goodness in all people…

…In a nutshell… try to connect with as many people as you can and find out the good in each person. That is why I am doing what I am doing.”

We look ahead, Autumn presents her findings, “I’m living in the present moment.” she paraphrases. “Memories of the past is a gone technology. I don’t need to recall all these little files of my past experiences. So as far as being in the moment and projecting that to what the future will be like for others. The only hope that I would have is that human beings, as they return within and live the higher consciousness. The consciousness we are meant to experience on Earth now; the human nature… to create and co-create. That we may choose to co-create the higher consciousness as a collective.”

Jason takes cue. “I’m not trying to piggy back off what Autumn said, but in my journey I’ve found myself, especially in the last year and a half, searching for that higher consciousness. And to just be in control of emotions and stuff like that.”

This is such a trippy afternoon, one that leads me to let go of trying to control, or even understand what draws us all together. But one thing I cannot deny is the spirit that is dwelling with Autumn, Jason and myself this summer day.

Jason propels us to consider a more united society, “A hundred years from now…? It would be ideal if everybody can be in tune with their higher man and all operating in their higher consciousness.”

Autumn comes back to center with a strong challenge, one that is interestingly presented in the most peaceful tone, “So again… we need to get beyond all the civil bullshit… the terrorism… the ego I-am… and get into the collective I-am; to ascend beyond these lower realms in which we have been living.”

“Right…” Jason aligns (it’s like these two have known each other forever). “…Beyond religious barriers and certain sects that kind have of imprisoned some people… We have to try to connect with that higher being… All one synchronized movement… all in one.”

He tells of his journey, “If I could try to get a grasp of what consciousness is. How to tap into certain energy levels and stuff like that… If somebody could make me understand that…”

And with a wonderful Jamaican accent, Jason (as Autumn has done) takes a breath in challenging us, “…I think that it is our moral responsibility to be able to help people that way. Just like we say, we are all humans. And if one person is working on a lower frequency, we all have the responsibility to try to show him how to get to the next level.

For example: If it is an addiction, then we have to find out what is causing a person’s suffering. We have to try to get to the bottom. Too not judge and to consider what is causing him to deflect to the bottle.”

Jason talks of his forty-four days of reaching out. “How far I’ve gotten has been from meeting people who did not pre-judge me… Oh, you’re black…! Or, anything like that… You know what I mean. I’ve found out that not everybody is bigoted and I try to be that kind of person.

I meditate in the mornings and visualize how I want my day to go… and it’s been working for me so far.

We are all connected… we are all one… that is what I have noticed.

For me, this is a mental exercise to overlook whatever physical barriers people may have.” Jason concludes.

As I referenced in today’s into, Serendipity, Karma, Fate, Accident, Coincidence or any other thought from Gestalt to a broad range of reference on a number of laws of attraction…

…Who knows for sure of their existence? Yet, time, some science and personal experience leans us in the direction of at least examining the validity of these unseen powers.

And for whatever reason, some universal force has put three absolute strangers together this day. Strangers who all confess of a shared feeling that drew us all to one similar geographic location for a brief encounter in understanding.

There is hope for unity around us. And regarding the tools that may lead us there, might I once again propose a few: Look, Listen and Hear.

And new friends… Autumn… Jason… keep moving forward… knowing that we hear you.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 336: “In Pharaoh’s Words”

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“Take every day one day at a time…” Says new friend Pharaoh, “’…Too often people get stressed out because they are taking on too much. They worry about tomorrow or the day after. But if they focus on just one day… and in getting through that day, in being able to meet the goals of that day, they won’t get so bombarded about how they are going to pay rent…? How they are going to meet they’re obligations…? Or thoughts like how am I going to pay for school?

People get so caught up in stuff like that… I’ve been there myself. You fall into something almost like a web of concern…and before you know it… you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders… That can lead to depression, stress and other things like that. Just take one day at a time… knowing that tomorrow, things will most likely work themselves out.

And, whatever your goals are… whatever you are trying to accomplish, you take one step every day in that direction, and know that every day is significant… no matter how small the steps. Learn to tell yourself, ‘Today, I got something accomplished.’”

“Where do you see us in the future?” I ask Pharaoh.

He takes a peaceful breath, “’In Seven years…? Hopefully… in a better place in terms of unity. Right now… I have to say on a world front, especially here in America, we are divided into tribes… groups. And as long as we are divided we can’t get anything done or any legislation’s past. Racial lines continue to be there… prominent… even though we are 2012.

In seven years there will be more unity. And when there is unity, everything else gets better: The economy … programs for our kids… for those who are disadvantaged or homeless… the handicapped. But as long as we are divided… nothing can happen.

Division… even with religion, Christians and Muslims, Catholics, Protestants, Jewish, whatever… and it makes no sense to me.

Over the next seven years… I hope… I pray! that our country will be unified. And as a nation we can do good on the world front. Right now we are divided.

We need to remember we are all connected. Maybe we speak difference languages. Maybe we have different backgrounds. But as long as we are divided we cannot help our neighbors.

And hopefully in the next seven years everyone should have more respect for self, for neighborhood, and most importantly… for every day communities. You know… schools… churches… that we may just be more unified.

Everyone has a valid perspective. Everyone has their own set of problems that they were born into. I truly believe that if we focus on unity we will become stronger as a people.

We are all part of the same body and we are all part of something significant. And, I think when we understand that, whether it be in China, Korea, Sudan, or wherever, we all have to be unified and pray about each other. If we could focus on that, there would be less war.

Love is the most powerful force. I’ve seen it work. Like in the civil rights movement where every race came together. It really wasn’t an African-American issue; it was a human issue, a civil rights issue. And you notice, even today, different races… different problems… same thing.

We need to find some common ground… some common denominator. Somewhere we can work towards getting to the point to where we can say, ‘Ok, what’s your issue? If I can help… let me help?’

And if we can come together… anything is possible… that is, if we want it that big.’”

“Why seven years?” I inquire.

Very thoughtfully, Pharaoh explains, “If we look too far… we lose sight. But still we have to set goals. I look at a year as a day. There are seven days in a week… then we start a new week. So, I give us seven years to work towards a new beginning.

Seven years is not too short of a period to expect real change and it is not too wide to ignore looking at our future with urgency.”

Pharaoh, thank you for taking the time to chat with us. See you… no hear you, on the radio waves.

Oh yeah, readers, I forgot to tell you, Pharaoh is an up and coming R&B artist. Now on tour and releasing his first album in the fall. I promised him I’d hook you up with his Facebook. Check him out if you get a moment.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 298: Divina’s Call, “We’re All Alive”

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“We don’t know what everyone else is dealing with. It just seems that so few people think of that.

We’re all alive. It’s crazy… people are so rude and inconsiderate of other people. It makes me crazy… I don’t understand.

Whatever you’re dealing with, you don’t have to project it on everybody else… it’s crazy.

Treat people the way you want to be treated. It’s like my number one thing. It really makes my life easy and simple. I don’t have any enemies, or hate, or resentment. It’s really good.”

Says Divina of life, and in her advice “The Golden Rule” strikes again, “Treat people the way you want to be treated.”

The Golden Rule… You’ve heard me report of it many a time. And for the sake of positioning my comments today, know that it is by choice that I use the word report. For whenever I write of the The Golden Rule premise, it is through the voice of those who uniquely share their perspectives on its adaptation. The intent being, to footnote its relevance in enlightening us to the knowledge that every day of our lives, there are probably more people than we realize questing the same compassionate respect: To be treated with dignity, kindness and acceptance.

I’m blown away that we are this far into 365. The time has flown by and in two days we will officially hit the three hundred day mark. We really are in the final countdown of its mission of getting us to put our feet in the shoes of others. And doing so without fear, void of comparison and with a loving outlook.

“We’re all alive,” Davina’s heartfelt observation of society as she dreams of a kinder world…

Funny thing… As I write, an exercise is coming into my mind. I don’t know why, but for some overpowering reason, Davina’s statement has caused my subconscious to tell me to lift my hands from the keyboard and to sit back in my chair… To take rest in relaxing my mind for a few minutes… To close my eyes in letting go of my control… To take a few breaths in feeling the air… And to try to recall as many faces as I can of the people I have associated with over the last week or so. Visualizing the humanity in all… regardless of the experience. And lastly, to ground the meditation with Divina’s call, “We’re all alive.”

For the sake of unity, I ask you to join me in the experiment. Here we go, I’ll be right back (Setting my timer for three minutes)…

And Readers if you are joining me… Don’t read on until after your meditation.

… I return… That was interesting. I entered my meditation with high expectations, and it was very revealing. In closing my eyes I prepped my mind with Davina’s words, “We’re all alive.”

I took my breaths, shut of my mind, and at first, all that I felt was the need to go to sleep. Really more like a peaceful blankness was in my head. So I started to force my mind, focusing on specific situations of the many people who I interacted with over the last week As I did, I got distracted by a conversation between my daughter and wife that echoed in the background of my home. I again forced my mind to refocus, and entered the same mind blank state of peaceful relaxation. The faces blurred into a great noise and amidst it only a few came to focus. One: A client, who with stress in his eyes, unloaded on me about an issue with a location. At first I took it as an attack, but later realized he was trusting me with his feelings. Two: A friend of mine who on Thursday was so distant that it seemed as if I had offended him. Today I found out it was the day he lost his job. Three: Another semi close friend who I have avoided in fear of enmeshment, who only hours ago uplifted me with one of the most caring phone conversations I have had in a long time. The faces began to un-blur when the timer alarm sounded.

Now I sit here rather exposed. An exposure that has left me a little ashamed and life checked. Now I’m not trying to make myself out as heartless, but three minutes of meditation awakened me a bit. An awakening, that although has been progressing throughout the last hundreds of 365 days, is unexpectedly double-checked by Davina’s advice.

Here is my assessment, too many times have I taken first impression personally. In all three faces that focused into mind, all were reaching to me and I did not see it at that time.

Very humbling to admit, of all the experiences I encountered… many of the most bonding ones, where in reality, the ones that I wanted to escape from.

What’s this teaching me, or us? I’m extremely curious to know how the exercise affected you? If you did it? PLEASE COMMENT AND LET US ALL KNOW. The sum whole of the experiment could be a great teacher to us all.

Divina has felt at times this world to be rude and inconsiderate. And although difficult to understand, perhaps it is really a world of equally fearful and quite possibly pained people.

People who sadly have tendency to divide themselves in reaction to outwardly perception or inward insecurities, rather than to take pause to breathe in examining the full measure of any given interaction.

And do we, in the word of Divina, Project what we are dealing with on everybody else?

Probably so… And, in a way, that’s not always the healthiest thing, considering that the opposite stance of keeping it in would be as equally unhealthy. Just look at the statistics of chronic hypertension in modern society.

Thus, here is the lesson learned, as least for me. “It is up to the listener to direct the action or resolve, not the other way around.”

My meditation reveals this to me. I did not seek to review the above-mentioned situations. I even tried to steer my mind in another more pleasant direction. But that is where it went as I let go of controlling it.

“It’s crazy!” Divina exclaims with an engaged acceptance.

Maybe, maybe not… Or is it what makes us all unique, powerful and equally vulnerable: Basically… HUMAN.

I’ll vote for human.

“I don’t have any enemies, or hate, or resentment,” Davina expands.

In my world, not saying that I am out to make enemies, or to hate, or to harbor resentment. But after only three minutes of closed eyed reflection, I realize that I have three much closer relationships that I previously did not understand.

Divina is a wise soul. I ask her about the future. She responds previewed by a long sigh. “I worry about our future… honestly… It feels like we are at battle with our planet… our home… It’s crazy.

I think it’s like evolution, all these technological advancements… I wonder… And I hope it really is an evolution.

I’m kind of like old-fashioned, I guess… Kind of like and old spirit a little… I’m like an old person…” She chuckles, “…People are like doing all these gadgets and stuff. It just seems very impersonal.”

We’ve spoken often of the impersonal nature of the new world of virtual communication. A very real issue with modern society and one not to be brushed under the carpet.

But what is striking hard at the core today is how do we react with each other in the real face-to-face world. Not like in the virtual sphere, where with the click of a mouse, or through the touch of a screen, we can easily disengage. But in the trenches of the difficult life moments of this existence we call living.

Divina, you are powerfully on target!

We are “ALL ALIVE.”

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 281: “A Burger That Introduced Me To A Brighter Light”

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“I was getting famous, it was turning me into a product and I did not like it. That is when I went into finance,” Jerry accounts of his life.

Over the last nine months hundreds of people have now graciously given of themselves in contributing to 365. All brave individuals who without reserve have allowed us into there lives in trusting me to forward their stories, advice and photos to you.

Several times have we discussed the laws of attraction and also have experienced several unexplainable meetings of strangers turned friends. From connecting third parties beyond our circle of influence, to answering literal prayers and personal reflections, it’s all occurred within the 365 journeys. Sure, some have been powerfully apparent while others not so much. We’ve even experienced days where we have struggled to literally find acceptance from anyone, and once found conducted somewhat contrite and forced interviews. But nonetheless… in all… I… and I hope you, have been thoroughly fascinated.

We are indeed a unique population with so much depth, so much diversity and so much combined experience. From pains to joys we have shared. Yet what is apparent with the loudest of volume is this, in some infinite way, we are all connected in one wish. That of a better world, a found life perspective and a planet filled with a kinder people.

Today is no exception.

I find myself in a funky little burger joint in wait of a casting session a few blocks away– killing time, and through the sandwich I’m eating, I’m sure my arteries as well.

As I take my last bite of seared cholesterol, a well-mannered gentleman sits at the booth directly in front of me. Our eyes meet and without my prompt this stranger greets me with a warm expression of acceptance.

It would be wrong of me to not reciprocate in an equally kind gesture. “Hello, how are you?” I reply.

We engage in a friendly and casual conversation and in such Jerry, once stranger now friend, agrees to join us in our 365 mission of unity.

Earlier I spoke of the laws of attraction and the moment Jerry begins to speak regarding the concept.

“The age-old question as to what is the meaning of life is found in two words…” Jerry summarizes, “…Expression and Experience.

Every living and non-living thing is expressing a quality of that which created it.

So what we express… we will experience… Period!

Look at an atom, electrons spinning around, communicating, the nucleus is the mother and the electrons are the children. And that analogy pulls it all together so you can see it very clearly.”

Jerry is a man of many talents (or perhaps gifts): A clairvoyant, a well-grounded businessman, financial advisor and spiritual consultant. From this he has pooled a vast base of knowledge. One that he does not flaunt, but one that he leans on in guiding his life voyage. His agenda is apparent, to outreach as far as he can in sharing what is core to his heart.

Yet in his claims he remains objective, kind, optimistic and approachable. “I used to work with Uri Geller on the Powers of the Paranormal. Uri told me to be careful with my gifts and to not show them off. I was under a contract to perform and at that moment I realized I had to change my life… I negotiated out of the contract and that is when I moved into the financial business.

I was very successful… became very rich in five years (I won’t tell you Jerry’s past worth, and he has the saved bank statements to prove it). But due to the greed and dishonesty of others I lost it when I moved from Texas to California.”

I even realized that my marriage was under false pretenses, so I gave what I had left to her and I’m much happier now.”

Jerry talk of a highly spiritual view towards humanity and the planet, “The world at large…? Thoughts and things are very much alike. And, we should approach life as if it is a thought… and not a thing.

Move the words around, things are thoughts, not thoughts are things.

Your experience meets with your expression to create unique points of attraction. Not so much as drawing something to you. That requires a great labor of thought. But if we can learn to use our thoughts as platforms to reach out and tether onto the dream and draw it in. I call it Metaphynetics.”

Jerry is an extreme optimist and he is passionate regarding his view of positive mind-set, good values and of the potential for a united world.

“I see democracy coming around!” he speaks with conviction, as if he has had a three-dimensional vision. “…It’s too beautiful of an idea to throw to the wayside, because none of the other systems have worked as well: And with that, most of the world population being Muslim…”

I did a little research. Jerry is correct in his claim. Per 2012: Christianity, 31% to 35% or 2.1 – 2.5 billion people; Islam, 23% or 1.6 billion people.

“… And when they start seeing how to separate church and state, then that progress will relieve much poverty. You see… most of those impoverished nations are Muslim nations.”

Now Jerry is not bagging on the Muslim faith. What I think he is referring to is how the will of time generated hatred in the name of faith can become epidemic. And in this reference, Jerry calls all of us to accountability to observe our faiths in directing the good values in whatever we choose to believe, or how we worship optimistically towards our fellow-man.

But there is one thing Jerry makes certainly clear. In the end we all worship the same God… the creator of the universe. He even aligns our actions in asking us to do all of our acts in life; even business with a positive conscience towards the planet and all those we deal with.

And with the aid of his Muslim statistic, Jerry postulates, “It not so much the religion, but you can’t do business with someone in the name of Ala.”

My take… Jerry is instructing us to respect individual value systems and navigate life with honor and honesty.

Jerry is very deep and extremely intriguing, his concepts are well founded and creatively lucid. And using a well-defined description of “Faith, that being the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not yet seen,” he goes on to link to our financial systems.

“Faith… That’s what our currency is based on… but we are the collateral.

So if we have faith in each other, and that the system of democracy, the one that is as close to God’s system of man doing business with man. It will all go right back to expression and experience.

Patience is the expectancy of good. And when you are waiting for something good, it seems like it takes longer. It feels that way because the body has a clock in it… Call it saccadic rhythms. What we fear seems to come quicker because we are on Adrenalin at that point.”

Makes me think of the hindsight is 20/20 theory and of the list of discussions we have shared regarding embracing all of our experiences, both good and bad.

Jerry humbles in revealing his perspective, “After I lost my wealth, it made me check my core.

The whole field of humanity opened up to me, and it will for anyone if they operate from love… No matter where they are… and if they are truly doing it.”

Of the future, again Jerry speaks as if viewed from a prophetic vision, “In five of ten years… Islam will create a separation of church and state. Technology will overrule, and peace will start to expand.”

Jerry, thank you for opening your mind, your heart and our eyes.

Hope to run into you again my friend; we can pick our discussion back up.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 234: Pappy

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“I used to have no remorse for anybody. I’d do anything, anytime… and with no questions… They called me suicide.

I’m not that person anymore,” Pappy introduces himself to me as he exposes the reason for his change of life, “You have to faith in god.”

An x-rider from a serious bike gang, Pappy openly spends a few hours with me today as I run into him outside of a local grocery store.

“I was not a good man and have done a lot of things in my life that I regret. But now my life is very different. I will never go back to the way I was. And I am on the streets to protect people.”

Pappy tell me of his rebirth to society, “’I remember leaving San Francisco, (he is referring to San Quentin) and coming home to Canoga Park (he even went to the same high school as my wife, played football there).

I had two hundred dollars in my pocket and that was it. As many ex-cons do, I could have found a room for the night, got a few beers and started the next day with nothing. Instead I went to my parole officer. He greeted me with, ‘I thought you’d never make it!’”

Pappy tells me of the doubt that his parole officer had about his release. He even admits to breaking his parole on three occasions. Yet in this admission, Pappy also talks of his growth. “I committed to change my life. I got out of the gang and began the work to change my life. It was hard, but I did it.”

Pappy tells me of his battle with relapses to past behaviors and of the way he felt when he was in the depths of what he calls, “My days of no remorse.”

“I never want to feel that way again,” Pappy reminiscently expresses. A stark contrast to the tattooed tears he bears under eyes. And empowering his street earned wisdom is a tremendous spirit of empathy that veils the very atmosphere around him.

Pappy has made countless bad choices, something that he has no hesitations in discussing. “I made a lot of mistakes in life that put me in Arizona State Penitentiary for seventeen years and San Quentin for another two.”

What is remarkable is the passionate focus Pappy carries in his revitalized life quest for doing whatever he can to help those around him.

He tells me of a story. “’A few years ago I needed to make a phone call and I had no money. I asked a man in a white shirt and tie if he had a quarter to spare. He walked past me as if I was invisible. A year later I was walking down the same street and I ran into the same man again. This time he was dirty, scared and homeless. I recognized him, and he recognized me. At first he did not approach me, so I asked him if he was alright. ‘I’m hungry and don’t know where I will get food, he said. I showed him where to eat and gave him five bucks. I carried no anger for the way he treated me the first time I met him. I was more concerned for his safety.’”

Pappy shares other accounts of his change of perspective away from self and towards others. Accounts that are far too many to write. But I can paraphrase as a whole. Bottom line… most of the local stores, police, fire stations and his community of homeless know Pappy well. In Pappy’s words, “They used to fear me, now they are my friends.”

Friends who have helped to shelter, feed, warm and watch out for Pappy since realizing that he is a changed man.

As verified in quoting his parole officer, who when Pappy completed his final parole time said, “When I first met you, I was pretty sure you would not make it, you proved me wrong.”

Pappy takes only partial credit for his accomplishment in returning to society. “I could not have done it on my own, first I give credit to God, but I really need to much give credit to pastor John, he saved me.

When the pastor first met me, I was not living the way I knew I needed to live. Pastor John never judged me, he never worried about what I would do, and with no questions asked, he reached out to me, trusting me to work as security for his church, door keys and all.”

A trust that to this day Pappy is committed to value in never breaking.

“I no longer care for myself only…” Pappy testifies, “…and even if you treat me wrong, I’m still going to treat you with respect.”

The feeling I get as I speak with Pappy is just as he states. Even standing in the fading light of his churches parking lot (we have since taken a walk from our grocery store meeting place) there is not a second that I feel in harms path. Quite the opposite actually, for I am absolutely positive my back is being watched. Pappy is just that kind of guy as evidenced by the caring waves from the cars of departing members of the congregation.

Pappy proclaims of his relationship with God, “Everything I think… he knows.

This is the first time in my life I have had peace. You see… for most of my life I was looking for acceptance anywhere I could get it. But now I realize that what I was really looking for was love.

I know that God loves me, and because of that, I want to do the best I can to love others.”

And it is this love, as well as Pappy’s regained respect for others, that has led him on the path to forgiveness, to himself, for others and an active voice in his sincere desire to be forgiven.

I’m OK living on the streets. I have a car (earned $1,600 dollars to purchase it by collecting cans) and my dog. For now, that is good enough for me. It’s a roof over my head and I count my blessings.

“I do not fear any longer, when I hear a siren behind me I don’t jump. They aren’t after me. And that feels good,” Pappy radiates.

“The world is basically going down the drain,” Pappy soberly councils. “The rich get richer, the poor get poorer and the sick… sicker. The homeless need to look out for each other, and that is why I am here.

Pappy is an iconic example of man’s ability for life change. A life changed away from crime, vice and selfishness. And a man who has earned the chops in understanding what he must do to continue the works he has committed his life to.

He leaves us with a quote as he walks me home in the darkness of the night, “Trust Only God… and never let you guard down.”

Pappy, we’ll talk again… my friend.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 232: “A Guide To All That Is Good”

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Every year there is an American tradition that has happened since the dawn of modern education… That tradition: The High School Prom.

A night where young men rehearse they’re gentlemanly conduct (they better) as young ladies are escorted to a fairy tail evening (we pray) in their practice of social graces.

And behind every elegantly dressed teen, there is a mother, or a father, or other mixtures of family dynamics.

Tonight is that very night, and I find myself smack dab in the center of activity in gathering with a special group of families; whom as a group have decided to give their kids a grand start to their prom memory.

Around me are twenty-two of the most beautifully and handsomely dressed kids, all coming together at the home of one of my most respected and long time friend, Tom (not pictured), the coordinator of tonight’s bus limousine prom start.

I’ve got to tell you a little about Tom, it’s relevant, for his persona does lead to the meeting of today’s stranger turned friend, whom I’ll tell you about in the next minutes.

Tom is a spiritual man. A great example of living a life committed to family values, and a life that is passionately centered in a real love for community. I use the word love intentionally, and in choosing it, I assure you that I understand the depths of its meaning. If ever I have met a man who exemplifies the purest of benevolence towards his fellow human… it is Tom.

Tom is one of 365’s constant fans. Not that he has the time to read every entry to it’s fullest, but his patronage is greater than that of solely reading it’s narrative. He believes in the project. So to receive an introduction from him is a charge to listen.

“Do you know Marilene?” he inquires as we chaperone tonight’s gathering moment in photographing and bidding our have fun’s to our troupe of glowing young couples.

“If not… you have to meet her… she is an amazing woman.” Tom directs.

So as the bus pulls away and the majority of parents have departed, I take time to introduce myself, and 365, to Marilene.

Tom calls Marilene amazing; I title her “A guide to all that is good.”

“There is always a tomorrow. To me it’s not worth stressing too much,” Marilene shares in her native French accent.

“I have learned that from experience. I’m a worrier at heart. Something that was part of my life from the start, growing up with a dad who was very negative and worried about everything.

But after time… I realized that is not a healthy way to live.”

Advice that I am sure many of us have similar experiences to reference. We all have our own set of histories from youth. Some dark… some bright, but all part of the evolution of who we are today.

Yet, Marilene does not cite any blame or contempt in her outlook. To quote, “I have hope for everything.”

And it is this hope that has healed her from the unexpected loss of her husband when he passed away only a short ten years ago.

“How many kids do you have?” I ask.

“Four… and they are great!” Marilene joyfully reacts.

“We have a lot of love in our house and they help me stay young.”

In my travels I have met many single parents, both men and women, all of whom are doing their best to raise balanced children.

I cannot even fathom single-handedly raising my one child, and hearing that Marilene is caring for four teens by herself is a feat the gets the fullest of my respect and admiration.

There is a question that is becoming a regular inquiry. A question that not one of my single parenting friends has avoided, “What advice do you have for other single parents?”

Without hesitation, and bearing the most positively infectious countenance of peace and strength, Marilene responds, “Be close to your kids… Talk to them… And never forget that you are a team!

Even when they are teens, I promise that they do listen… and they do understand. Even when you think they are not.”

We shift gears toward to future, and in expected positive form Marilene formats her views using a blend of poignant reality and ingratiating optimism, “The idea of a global world is something that I see coming.

We have to help countries that are having troubles, but what’s hard about it is that we can’t change people.

Maybe in a hundred years, people will look at each other differently. It’s going to be a slow change… but one that will happen.”

Marilene, we take heed to you council, thanks for chatting with us this evening.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 213: “It Will Make You A Stronger Person”

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I spent a bunch of time trying to be witty, insightful and entertaining in my writing today. Draft after draft I’ve written, and the more I try to weave my thoughts into the words of today’s friend, Michelle, the more I even bore myself.

Draft four has just hit the circular file, and in tossing it, I realize the Michelle has hit the ball out of the park with her comments. So in respect for you and to fully give credit to whom the applause is due, I present you the direct words of Michelle.

“Live life intelligently, and acknowledge that mistakes are bound to happen. Take them as lessons and learn from them. Don’t beat yourself up in accepting that nothing and no one is perfect… even yourself.

And, the more we forgive ourselves as well as others, the more emotionally aware we are as a person. The goal being internal peace… I know it’s hard to reach, but I believe it is attainable.

It’s all about how we live our lives and the way we treat others. There are so many levels of understanding towards people, and if we live life with an active awareness, living it and being aware, we will have more personal satisfaction while inspiring the people around us.

We can choose to bring peace to any situation or place. And if we do, we are stronger for other people. And that will also make us better people.”

Society in general is on a downward spiral. Sadly, I have to say that it is becoming too self-absorbed. I understand that we need to take care of ourselves. And I realize that in being responsible, some of life has to be that way.

It’s OK that everyone is an individual; it is supposed to be like that. But too many are becoming selfish and narcissistic; not paying attention to the bigger issues that are greater than themselves.

Everything happens for a reason, even the bad. You have to grow from it… learn from it… It’s all part of a bigger picture in your journey through life, and it is part of your personal experience… Embrace it… Accept it… It will make you a stronger person.”

Michelle… home run kiddo!

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 174: Young Survivors

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Two nights ago you were with me at Cloud 9 Hookah Lounge as we spent a short time with Karnnitha, a young woman with a true purpose in life. She shared with us her insights and desire to reach out in helping the women of the world, enlightening us to the troubles facing the many unfortunate young women.

We talked of the greatness in all of us and today we will pick that discussion back up in meeting our new friends of day 174.

But before I tell you about them, I have a confession; I did not meet them today. I actually met them as I was leaving Cloud 9 after my interview of Karnnitha.

Picture me as a 365 billboard, everywhere I go handing out cards in promoting its purpose to all I pass by. So as I leave Cloud 9, I take a second to say hello to a group enjoying an evening of Hookah chill.

Well… a second turns into twenty minutes. Fascinating conversation and by the glow in faces of my unknown, and young acquaintances, is a proclamation of their great depth and experience. I cannot pass on extending them an offer to contribute to 365. They light up and we arrange a meeting place, Rite Aid in the Calabasas commons shopping center. A strange place to meet, but it is there call… so I go with it.

Two days pass and I find myself standing outside of our agreed upon Rite Aid. Its cold, and waiting in the parking lot, I stand in expectation of my friend’s arrival. When from behind me I hear, “Richard.” I turn and there they are, two unique and caring young adults, both obviously committed to their special friendship, readers please give welcome to survivors, Taylor and Ben.

You will understand what I mean by survivors as you read on.

I have to ask, “Why Rite Aid?”

“It’s our office, we have a place to sit in the back,” They laugh.

“The managers and everyone who works here knows us, its warm and they let us hang out. Sometimes they even feed us.”

That place to sit they talk of… the waiting area of the pharmacy. We even have a screen for privacy. At one point during beginning introductions the manager walks over, places his hand on the screen and firmly commands, “Why is this here!”

Ben fly’s off, “Because we need privacy!”

I’m caught a little off guard, and trying to lessen the uncomfortable situation, I try to diffuse, “Do you want me to take them outside?” I joke with what looks like a very annoyed store manager.

They all crack up. The joke is on me. These kids are special and the manager knows it. Seems I’ve been set up. Our manager friend replaces the screen and we begin a deeper conversation.

Taylor goes first in encouraging all, “Don’t give up, only the strong survive.”

Only the strong survive? A very bold opening statement from a very young mind.

I quickly discover that Taylor has earned the badges to own such a sentence.

“I was very rebellious, ran away at fourteen, I lied about my age, told them I was sixteen and got a job at a restaurant that paid under the table. From there I couched it at friends houses until one day I moved in at the house of a guy that I really liked. That was a big mistake. The police came and arrested everyone. I got sent to one of those places in Utah for a year and a half. I hated it, but it saved me. While I was there I wrote letters to my father, he was in too.”

I have to interrupt, “He was in too? Was you father incarcerated?”

“Yes,” Taylor tells me, “But our letters helped bring us together and motivated both of us to rebuild our lives.”

Under sixteen and rebuilding her life? Think about that for a moment…

Taylor is a unique young woman, she is a blend of radical independence mixed with a charming and heart-felt attachment to the importance of family.

“Man! It doesn’t matter where you are in the world, if you have family, they will always be there. You have to have good family values.”

Even though Taylor and her father have lived, and learned, via the school of hard knocks, they both have a special connection, one that is apparent in Taylor’s words.

So what is core to Taylor’s rebellion? Believe it or not it is a medical condition, ADHD. In telling me of it Taylor speaks with the maturity of a women twice her age and has a regard for its influence on her life. Yet she looks at life with optimism and vigor, “You only have one life to live, if you are given the opportunity to do it, take it, and you have to be yourself.”

With the inclusion of Ben, we talk about being yourself. Taylor talks of life and what she sees in other kids her age, “People need to find happiness from within, not from the world around them. So many kids are unhappy. That’s why they go to school with guns or overdose, because they are unhappy.”

Ben opens up, “I’d love to see us all get alone. I see too many people hating and fighting because of religion and skin color. And I believe in second chances. If someone messes us, we have to give them a second chance.”

“Easy for a kid to say…” the pessimistic may shout. But I tell you, of all the people I know, Ben is the one who has the right to make this claim.

“When I was five I was shot because I am Jewish. I got hit by two bullets, one in the leg and the other in the abdomen. I lost fifty percent of my blood and almost died.

The guy who shot me was a member of the Arian Nation Movement and came here from Idaho to make his point. He walked into our Jewish Center and opened up… shot five of us. Then he left and shot and killed a Filipino man at another location. It was a big deal and in the national news. I remember meeting President Clinton, my mom speaking to Ted Kennedy, and a lot of other famous people stood by us. But that was a while ago. I’m past it and hold no hatred for what happened to me.”

By the way, Ben is also diagnosed with ADHD, part of the reason for the special bond of friendship he and Taylor share.

Ben has been brutally attacked by the hate of the world and Taylor has walked the paths of the lost, but both together prove the wonderment of the healing power of friendship.

A gentle giant, Ben speaks optimistically of the world, “I’d like to see a future where more people are sharing. People are selfish and greedy and that gets them in a lot of trouble.

And also, I’d like to see more real friendships.”

Taylor has this infections smile, and with it she praises Ben’s view of friendships with a loving, “Amen!”

These two young adults have seen life through dark forests, and even now they are not fully clear of the thistles.

Taylor talks of young womanhood and charges the new generating to shape up, “’The next generation of guys need to treat their women better. It’s not just the way they act, that Cholo thing; it’s the media too. They are messed up and trained to look at women as less than. They look at us as ‘Ho’s’ and ‘Bitches.’ What’s even sadder is the women are buying into it too. I know this first hand, I used to live that way and know how it feels. Girls need to step up and the guys need to respect them.’”

It is remarkable to meet two young people with the depth of life perspective, and experience, as both Ben and Taylor possess. In listening to them, I am acutely aware of the conditions the youth of America endure. Both of these special kids show astonishing stamina, and show powerful desire to overcome their obstacles.

Ben is in the fight for focus, and Taylor is battling to find her way through a history of vice and rebellion. But in both of these outstanding emerging individuals I see one common voice. A voice standing strong in a unified call to action.

As I mentioned, “There is greatness in all of us,” and Ben and Taylor are seeking theirs.

Ben, Taylor, you are of a noble generation, may you grow to be all that you can, and be able to do your part in making the planet a better place, we are counting on you.

Now go live your greatest dreams, my young friend!

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 173: “Quiet and Loving Greatness”

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“’My dad said you can do anything you want to do if you work hard enough. He was very strict and I always addressed him with ‘yes sir’ or ‘no sir.’ He was a workaholic. I did not understand it at the time, but now I do. He was teaching me.’”
—Ramon

“I’ll never view our friendship the same.” After twenty years of both a professional and growing friendship, it is a pleasure to call Chrissy (not photographed) my friend.

For close to 20-years we’ve seen each others lives develop. From career advancements to our marriages we have always stayed in contact. In a world as competitive, and seasonal, as the entertainment industry, it is quiet a special thing to meet people like Chrissy.

She is a person of remarkable values, and whether in rain or shine, we have always managed to somehow stay in touch.

I start today’s entry using this tribute in crediting Chrissy as the purest way to light the marque in introducing our newest friend, Chrissy’s father Ramon – Age Ninety.

It is Ramon’s birthday party, and I have been invited to meet him. What I did not realize, is that other than immediate family, I am the only guest. I can’t tell you how humbled I am to find this out and to be privileged to be enjoying a home-made lunch with six of the warmest people I have ever met. All a credit to family unity and absolute love.

And to be a participant in celebrating the life of the man who set the bar for the values that Chrissy and her family radiate is an honor greater than winning any industry award.

This is what life’s about, family and the traditions therein; the families we came from, the families we are starting, or even the families we create in our friendships. And today, after over twenty years of friendship with Chrissy, I feel as if I have a larger family in spending time with her, her brother and family, and my new friend, her father, Ramon.

Ramon tells me of his childhood, “’My dad said you can do anything you want to do if you work hard enough. He was very strict and I always addressed him with ‘yes sir’ or ‘no sir.’ He was a workaholic. I did not understand it at the time, but now I do. He was teaching me.’”

On a shelf are photos of his father and mother, Chrissy gets them down and shows them to me.

“I remember working with dad, dad built a Mexican bakery and I worked there when I was in high school. We lived in a house behind it, and later built a store in the front.”

That store…? It is right next to Ramon’s niece’s house where we are having our birthday celebration. The store has been sold by the family now, but it still stands as recognition of Ramon’s fathers accomplishments.

“’My dad was a very good businessman, he said, ‘One day I’m going to own the whole block,’ and he did end us buying most of it.’”

With ninety years of rich history Ramon is remarkably clear in his detailed remembrance of his life. We talk of his earliest childhood memories. Family, his life as an athlete (very accomplished at football and baseball), living through wars, the growth of Long Beach, and of his marriage.

With tears, “My wife is a good woman, she always gave… worked for 40 years as a social worker. For ten years I worked at the same Catholic welfare center as she did. That’s where I met her. She was so smart and loving.”

Ramon breaks down in emotion as he tenderly talks about his wife. I’m chocked up by his show of tears and sitting next to us, as well touched by the moment, Chrissy says, “Did dad tell you why mom is not here?”

That’s part of the reason Ramon is gentle and watery eyed.

We talk of purpose, “I don’t fully know my purpose anymore” Ramon tears.

You see… Ramon’s wife is in deep stages of Alzheimer’s, and with the aid of a caregiver, he takes care of her full-time in the house of their dreams.

“I want her to be in her home,” Ramon shines.

I’m chocking up, “Might I suggest something?” I ask.

We pause and I call it as I see it, “You have raised a wonderful family, all intelligent, caring, self-sustaining and loving. Plus, you are doing all you can to give your sweetheart comfort. Perhaps that is a big part of your purpose?”

Ramon is a Christian, “We have to stay with Christianity,” he says. “I know it looks bleak, but with the help of God, I know it will all work out.”

We talk of the eternal perspective, a view shared by many faiths in one way or another, and a point that has given many of us comfort in times of trial or grief.

“Maybe in the eternal perspective, you and she will be together again,” I share as we shift subjects.

Ramon relates his wishes for us in a captivating way, sharing his life and relating it to his wishes for us.

“My dad taught me the importance of respect for family and work ethic. And working with my wife as a social worker I learned compassion and understanding.”

Ninety years walking the planet, Ramon has seen a lot, lived full and loved well. All evident in the children he has raised.

Ramon gives us insight as to preparing for the future, “Education, get as much as you can… Travel, and see the world. You have to see how other people live so you can see what the world really is and who people really are.”

“I was lucky enough to work as a social worker. I worked with all kinds of kids by day, and hard to reach groups by night. That, plus thirty years working in oil refinery with Arco helped me to travel and see things.”

Sure… A close friend of mine introduces me to her father Ramon; yet in meeting him I realize there are strangers nearer than we think. Could be a distant family member, a relation of a friend or even a link through a neighbor. But in the end, we are all a family of sorts in sharing this earth. And the more we reach out to meet whomever, the better we all will be.

Chrissy, Family and new friend Ramon, thanks for letting me into your lives.

And Ramon, your wisdom and love is felt by us all. Live long my friend.

SideWalk Ghosts / Interview 123: “To Walk With Them As The Same”

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Dinner is in one hour and I decide to take a short evening stroll. Just need a little time of introspection to flush out my head. It’s been a buried business day, and albeit a positive one, I welcome a brief escape.

Well, I call it a stroll, but you and I both know, it’s really a thirty-pound of photo gear on shoulder world exploration. That’s just the way life is with my 365 commitment, and thank you for being with me on this amazing experience.

Today marks over four months for 365, and through it, we have witnessed the birth of a global community. I often say that I have no idea of were 365 is taking us. But one thing is apparent; it is helping many of us to reach out to the world.

I’ve been sincerely reading your remarks and have checked out your blogs. Your comments have been inspired and we now have over 1300 registered followers. Not bad for a little rag-tag blog.

365 is truly becoming more than a personal travel log, it has grown to be about people beyond us. Many new friends have joined us, and, in meeting them; it’s been constantly humbling the way they are driving us forward.

A new vocabulary of life’s perspectives is emerging, transparent to us all. With this, another global statement must be noted, “The world is filled with great people.”

And in talking of greatness, I am not focusing on media giants, wealth or any other form of power. The greatness I am referring to is the willingness of so many to look beyond themselves in honoring each other. A willingness that I am grateful to be part of every day as I reach out to my neighbor’s  of planet earth.

May we all continue to unite in “humanalution” (there’s that word I invented again).

With all this said, it is appropriate that I run into Justin, a very cool cat who is caretaking at Cloud 9 Hookah Lounge.

The place is only footsteps from my front door; yet, I’ve always been intimidated to walk in. Not because I don’t smoke, but embarrassingly, I have been afraid of a preconceived cultural divide. Thinking that whoever is in there… they will not understand who I am.

I am proven way off base, when I meet Justin, as he is setting a sidewalk sign. In approaching him, I feel of a peace he emits. And soon you will join me in understanding why.

“Be strong, not physically, but mentally,” Justin’s first advice for us.

He talks with optimism, all the while, directing it away from himself, “Provide yourself with more than you think you can do. Whatever it is, you can achieve it. And don’t stop dreaming, because dreams are the keys to the world.”

“Dreams are the keys to the world.” Not passion, not desire, not plans, not even education… Just dreams.

Justin and I talk about dreams for a while. In the end we conclude, that dreams are greater than passion, and are an important connection in defining our purpose on this planet. Thus, purpose, becomes the purest form of human motivation, for without it, how can we truly grow to find our fullest potential?

I’m writing a paper on purpose, and will share it with you in the future.

And for the sake of introducing the concept, Justin is our man of the hour.

On his arm is this tattoo, a self-written mission for life. It reads, “To walk with them as the same, thy here to take their pain, help them when they can not change.”

How eloquently this self-created, and very poetic verse, relates to the literal DNA of Justin’s love for the world around him.

“In high school, my career councilor told me that my tests showed that I had a propensity towards being a teacher, pastor or someone sharing a message.”

“To walk with them as the same, thy here to take their pain, help them when they can not change.” Purpose? I think so!

Here is the kind of stuff Justin does. He talks of pay it forward. But for him it is more than a concept… it’s a call to action. “Not so long ago a friend and I go into a Starbucks. We give $100 to the guy at the counter and asked him to use it to cover all the next customers until it is gone. We asked him to do it with one condition, ask everyone who receives the paid for drink to pass on a good deed.”

A monumental gesture from an (I’m sure) under funded twenty-two year old. His story blows me away. Like I said, “The world is filled with great people.”

“To walk with them as the same, thy here to take their pain, help them when they can not change…” Please go on?

Justin is a humble guy, he credits his career ambitions to words of his father, “My dad once told me that I have a gift; I did not understand what he was talking about at the time. But now I think I’m starting to.”

Justin is not boastful, self-promoting or egotistical at all in opening up with me, “I’ve always been a good listener and somehow I calm people.”

Calm people– “To walk with them as the same, thy here to take their pain, help them when they can not change.

Justin’s goal, “I’m about to start my training as a Hypnotherapist, I start school next month and will be practicing in six months. I want to use the gifts that have been given to me to help others. I hope I’ve found a way to do it.”

In speaking about the future.

“I want things get better politically, the government is going crazy.”

And on a more personal note, “Health wise, everyone in on drugs! I’m scared for the future.”

At first, I think he is using everyone in on drugs as symbolism for the way the world is running itself. On Drugs, meaning, Out of Control.

That is not what Justin is talking about; he is speaking of the factual use of drugs.

“Too many of my friends have fallen to hard drugs like XTC and Cocaine. I’ve seen it ruin their lives.”

“I remember learning this in high school, stay away from drugs, being told that Marijuana is a gateway drug. And now I fully understand, seeing how it is affecting my friends.

I even had to end my relationship with my girlfriend. She changed for the worst after getting into smoking Marijuana. She became an angry person, not the person who I knew before her addiction.”

Drug addiction has become quite a through-line over the last week… Strange how the web of 365 is forming?

All I can say is I’m glad I’m hanging in the Hookah. Still don’t smoke, but maybe I’ll stop by one and a while for a soft drink and a chat.

“Justin, I’m sure we will not be strangers.”